But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
