Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
time to smoke my breakfast
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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