508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
time to smoke my breakfast
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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