Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
