So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
