PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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