porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
