he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
