Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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