Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize