Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
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