You made me cry and you don't even care
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I think i got beer on your cat.
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