Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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