I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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