then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
