Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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