doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
