Did you just see the Batmobile???
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
