ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
