i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
