she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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