he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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