i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
