if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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