: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
