take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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