i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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