Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I came so hard my ears popped.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize