Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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