I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
