I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
