I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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