I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
