YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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