apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
