the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize