is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize