You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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