Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
