shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize