you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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