Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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