Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
