Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
