And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
