a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
