Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
