Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
