I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
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