I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
